It took less than fifteen minutes for Jonathan Coachman to completely tear apart the fabric of logic and reason during last night’s episode of Raw. That must be a new record.
As soon as the acting General Manager of Raw, Baron Corbin, announced that he would be facing Finn Bálor in the fourth of their best of fifty-three match series, I knew we were in trouble. Corbin ostensibly had the benefit of preparing for this match all week, whereas Bálor did not.
I have questions. Why did the General Manager spend all week preparing for a match when he should be focused on booking a three-hour show (his first, no less)? Wouldn’t Bálor already have the ‘Lone Wolf’ scouted, considering how often they’ve faced one another in recent months? WHAT THE HELL WAS COACHMAN BABBLING ON ABOUT DURING THIS MATCH?!
At first he seemed to acknowledge that Corbin’s plan was ingenious. Then he suddenly changed his mind and decided that Bálor had the advantage because he had faced Corbin previously (thankfully Corey pointed out the obvious loophole in this theory). Just as it seemed that we had reached the bottom of this nonsensical rabbit hole, with a snap of his fingers, the ‘Thanos of WWE commentary’ finally destroyed all semblance of reality. He claimed that the interim Raw GM should in fact be winning because he’s entitled to make whatever rules he wants.
I’m starting to realise that the only real loser in this never-ending feud is us.
But fortunately there was more to this episode of Raw than the opening segment. And my far more optimistic colleagues at WrestleTalk are here to take you through it. You know the deal by now: we gather four of our passionate writers and ask each of them to run through their single best and worst moment from last night’s Raw. Then we invite you to share your take on the show with us.
So, let’s get started with the good. I’m betting Coachman’s mind-numbing commentary won’t feature.