WWE Raw – February 11, 2019 (Review)

WWE Raw – February 11, 2019 (Review)

Raw has featured some nonsensical, contradictory segments in its past. I’m talking Hornswoggle being revealed as Vince McMahon’s child. Mae Young birthing a healthy, 2-pound human hand. Kevin Federline pinning John Cena in the main event in 2007. (And people say he never put anyone over.)

While nothing on last night’s show quite rose to those lofty standards, it was nevertheless a real doozy of an episode, riddled with confusing segments and illogical booking. Like Paris Hilton in the early 2000s, this show was all over the place.

As you can probably tell, I have a number of thoughts about Raw. But in keeping with the template the show set, I’m not going to sweat the little things like cohesion or context. Instead I’ll just deliver them all in a rapid-fire, borderline nonsensical sequence. So get comfy, because here we go.

https://www.instagram.com/p/Btw0JDEFN_d/?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet

Stephanie proudly proclaimed that Becky’s match with Ronda could be the biggest draw in WrestleMania history. But she wouldn’t let it happen unless Lynch apologised for knocking her out last week, setting the scene for the entire night to revolve around ‘The Man’s ethical dilemma. Surely Stephanie is the one who needs to swallow her pride in this scenario though? By her own admission, Becky vs Ronda is what’s “best for business”. Would she really let something as trivial as a non-apology scupper WWE’s marquee match? Why was no one talking about this?

The Samoan Slaughterhouse“. Christ almighty. If the Easter Island statues ever became self-aware, they’d have as much personality as Tamina and Nia Jax.

What does Finn Bálor know about being too prideful? He was completely nonplussed when surrendering the Universal title due to injury in 2016, and then never demanded a rematch upon his return. He also seems quite happy to have lost to Brock Lesnar at Royal Rumble, because he “made him believe”. I don’t think having too much pride is what’s holding you back, my man.

Becky thinks Finn’s abs are awesome. I concur. Obviously.

Renee Young implored Lucha House Party to let Elias sing his undoubtedly insulting and demeaning song. For goodness sake you’re a face, Renee! I mean, I think you are. Possibly. Aren’t you?

Lucha House Party spent ten minutes doing a lot of bad lucha things, leading Elias to clobber Kalisto with a conveniently placed second guitar. I’m happy for his feud with Jeff Jarrett to be over, but this reeked of one week filler material – which nobody really wants. Unless of course this encounter was intended to lead to the revival of Lucha House Rules matches… in which case we all desperately want this to be a one-week deal.

Mandy Rose and Sonya Deville suggested that they should be the first ever women’s tag team champions simply because they’ve been in – and lost – a whole bunch of other matches in the past year. Later in the night, the IIconics appeared in a recorded message to deliver a decidedly babyface promo about their chances at Elimination Chamber. Don’t worry, none of this matters. Investor marketing isn’t canon.

This was followed by another blatantly bad call from a WWE official. This week, the referee missed Finn’s foot clearly being on the rope during a pin fall. The match was almost immediately restarted, but that only begs the question – what was the point of the screwy finish in the first place? To demonstrate that the only competent company official is Curt Hawkins?

Seth Rollins said he was willing to sacrifice everything, to sell his soul to the devil himself if it meant beating Brock Lesnar at WrestleMania. This peculiar choice of words struck me as a bit odd. Remember when Stone Cold said he needed to beat The Rock at WrestleMania X-Seven and that he was willing to do anything to ensure that he walked out with the title? Austin unexpectedly turned heel that night, and I can’t shake the feeling that perhaps we’ll see the same thing from ‘the Architect’ come April.

EC3 (who has in the interim found EC1 and EC2) lost his second match on the main roster. To the same man he beat last week. Nikki Cross lost too. This is how you build stars.

I’m glad that The Revival are Raw tag team champions. I wish I could’ve written that sentence a year ago. This match was great. Also, Chad Gable is awesome.

Becky ultimately capitulated, apologised to her bosses and meekly shook their hands. And then she got suspended anyway, yanked from the WrestleMania match and replaced by Charlotte.

I would’ve preferred to see Mae Young pop out another hand baby.

So my feelings about last night’s Raw are fairly obvious. But fortunately my opinion isn’t what really counts. You’re here to find out what our decidedly more optimistic WrestleTalk team thought of the show. Read on to find out.

5 years ago by Nicholas Holicki

Trending

Get the latest wrestling news straight to your inbox

By submitting this form, you are consenting to receive marketing emails from WrestleTalk