WWE Raw – July 15, 2019 (Review)

The biggest question heading into Raw after Extreme Rules was “where to now?”

To call the ending of the pay-per-view reminiscent of a hamster running on a wheel would be a disservice to both the hamster and the wheel, while also exaggerating the amount of progress that WWE has been able to achieve so far this year.

Because as Extreme Rules went off the air, with Brock Lesnar once again the champion and a devastated Seth Rollins looking on, one would be forgiven for thinking this was an event from mid-March. Or mid-February. Or late January.

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The point is that in all this time, not much has changed. Historically, pay-per-views were designed to close a chapter on a story. They were sufficiently spaced out so as to provide finality to one self-contained narrative, with enough time until the next big show to allow for development of new feuds.

That’s no longer the world we live in, as the company’s accelerated pay-per-view cycle creates an atmosphere in which one show bleeds over to the next. Feuds carry over, seemingly with no end in sight, leading to countless rematches and rehashed promo segments.

Nowhere is that more evident than with Brock Lesnar and Seth Rollins. The original feud started in January, after Rollins won the Royal Rumble and the right to face ‘The Beast’ at WrestleMania. Then he conquered the apparently unconquerable, in the process becoming the ‘Beast Slayer’ and Raw’s top babyface.

However, three months later, Brock is back. And he’s once again the champion. With Seth his top challenger. It’s the tangled web of WWE booking that we’re never able to escape. So inevitably we end up in neutral, furiously hitting the accelerator yet travelling absolutely nowhere.

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So Raw this week had a choice. An opportunity at a new beginning. Would we be steered down the same path yet again, towards a repeat of the Brock / Rollins feud? Or would the show be brave enough to depart from the conventional – elevating a new challenger to tackle ‘The Beast’? A new face to inspire fans and breathe new life into a tired main event scene. Only time would tell.

Let’s get to the review.

The Best of Raw

The Beast is Back

Raw kicked off with the controversial champion, carrying a much maligned purple belt and accompanied by a provocative advocate. Yep, Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman started the show, with some good ol’-fashioned gloating.

But they weren’t there to brag about the Money in the Bank cash-in at Extreme Rules, nor the ensuing quick victory over Seth Rollins. Nope. Heyman was there to remind us all that he had predicted precisely what was about to happen in advance. He smugly alluded to the segment last week in which he guaranteed a cash-in at the pay-per-view, which promise he later repeated during Sunday night’s event. We were all just too naive – and too simple-minded – to see it coming.

"Ladies and gentleman. We told you so." –@HeymanHustle @BrockLesnar pic.twitter.com/WouZjAJMSd

— WWE (@WWE) July 16, 2019

He then transitioned to Brock’s challenger at SummerSlam in less than a month’s time, announcing a “Cross-Branded, All-Star, Top-10 Battle Royal” to determine who that man would be. Because everything in WWE needs a colossally stupid name.

Regardless, the competitors in the Battle Royal to decide the number one contender (I refuse to call it anything else), comprised… *large breath*… Seth Rollins, Randy Orton, Big E, Cesaro, Braun Strowman, Rey Mysterio, Baron Corbin, Sami Zayn, Bobby Lashley and Roman Reigns. Whew.

Although it’s unclear how these ten “All-Stars” were decided – considering that at least two of them lost on Sunday and three didn’t even feature at the pay-per-view – I’m all for chaotic, multi-man arrangements to decide title challengers. I’d prefer a tournament of some sort, but absent some ridiculous name, that was always going to be a long shot. May I suggest a Brawl For All?

It’s Happening!!

For months now we’ve been speculating about how the revitalised Bray Wyatt will debut his new gimmick on TV. Fantasy booking scenarios have included answering Aleister Black’s challenge. That didn’t happen. Or perhaps calling out The Undertaker. That didn’t happen either.

With each passing week, fans started to get increasingly restless about the direction of the new character. We hadn’t seen instalments of Firefly Fun House for weeks, and with the exception of a few cheeky appearances by his puppets, Bray Wyatt was nowhere to be seen.

And then it happened.

As Finn Bálor stood in the ring, celebrating having avoided an ambush by Samoa Joe, his music became distorted and stopped. Then the lights in the arena began to systematically shut off, one by one. The universal language of a big-time debut.

When strobe lights again illuminated the ring – as creepy sound effects rang throughout the arena – all we saw was a masked Bray Wyatt cradling Bálor. As the arena lights came back up, the ‘Fiend’ delivered a Sister Abigail to the Irishman. The lights turned back off, the energised crowd chanted expletives and Wyatt cackled maniacally.

It was freaking awesome!

More Championship Shenanigans

Drake Maverick and his wife checked into a hotel under pseudonyms in an effort to avoid any challengers to his 24/7 Title. And also to possibly consummate their wedding. Two stones, I suppose.

What he failed to take account of though was the spy-like R-Truth, who was hiding behind a large curtain in the lobby. Although I did find it strange that after emerging from his hiding place – presumably having witnessed the entire scene that just played out five feet away – R-Truth nevertheless deemed it necessary to bribe the hotel employee at the front desk in order to find out if “Hornswoggle” had checked-in.

.@RonKillings needs some help finding @WWEMaverick 💵. #Raw pic.twitter.com/2ecUrrVpWP

— WWE Universe (@WWEUniverse) July 16, 2019

Logic has no place in the 24/7 Championship picture though, it’s all about preposterous entertainment. And I was preposterously entertained.

Later in the night, Maverick attempted to consummate his marriage in a very romantically decorated hotel room. He slipped into something more comfortable – which in his case meant fully nude wearing only the 24/7 Championship.

Just as Drake thought he was in the clear though, some champagne was delivered. And then the staff member removed his uniform to reveal a referee’s shirt underneath. And… the fix was in!

After a brief moment of panic, R-Truth emerged to attack Maverick and pin him on the bed to reclaim his title. I’m guessing that’s not the sexy moment that Maverick had in mind.

Cross-Branded, All-Star, Top-10 Battle Royal

What a mouthful.

Considering the mass of humanity involved, this was a fairly short seven-minute match that’s too exhausting to describe play-by-play. In essence, the match was really just a series of big moves and eliminations until we got to the final four of Seth Rollins, Braun Strowman, Roman Reigns and Randy Orton.

Rollins then toppled both Reigns and Strowman in one fell swoop, before Orton, who had been thrown through the middle rope earlier in the contest, snuck back into the ring.

A fun exchange then played out between the two men, with neither able to get the upper hand for long. Eventually Orton attempted the RKO, which Rollins countered with a kick to the midsection and a Stomp, before guiding Orton over the top rope.

He's done it! @WWERollins wins the #BattleRoyal and will meet @BrockLesnar at #SummerSlam! #Raw pic.twitter.com/Uh0dq8smEx

— WWE (@WWE) July 16, 2019

In hindsight, time permitting, I really would have preferred a tournament style formula for determining the next top challenger. Because the Battle Royal didn’t really serve to bolster anyone in defeat, and truthfully only served as a fairly predictable coronation of Seth Rollins.

Regardless, heading into SummerSlam, we once again find ourselves in the same position we were in to start the year. With Brock Lesnar as Universal Champion and Seth Rollins as the underdog challenger.

The Worst of Raw

Random Alliances

The Usos & Ricochet teamed up to take on Robert Roode & The Revival in a… christ almighty… two-out-of-three falls match.

The match was fine, but did nothing to distract me from constantly wondering “cool, but why?“. Ricochet pinned Scott Dawson inside the first minute. Cool, but why? It was at this point that I realised that this was ANOTHER two-out-of-three falls match. Cool, but why? And apparently Ricochet is aligned with the Usos now, while Robert Roode has found some pals in The Revival. COOL, BUT – yeah, you get the point.

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The match was a decent affair, but completely overshadowed by the nagging frustration in the nonsensical, arbitrary booking decisions. For the record, Ricochet again pinned Roode for the final victory. Then The Club walked out for a bit of a brawl, which the heels got the better of.

The Viking Mid-Carders

The Viking Raiders again squashed a pair of jobbers this week, in a carbon copy of their usage last Monday. These supremely talented lads have been on the main roster for three months now, and they’re closer to Main Event than they are the Raw main event.

INCOMING!!! #Raw @Erik_WWE @Ivar_WWE pic.twitter.com/V3I9qJmm2Z

— WWE Universe (@WWEUniverse) July 16, 2019

Drew McIntyre Feuds with Gary ‘The Goat’ Garbutt

For reasons that are entirely unclear, Drew McIntyre burst into a locker room in which Finn Bálor, Cedrick Alexander and The Street Profits appeared to be obnoxiously yelling at one another. This bizarre scene made me worry that there may be a gas leak in my apartment. Why were they screaming at one another? And while we’re on the topic, who strung up Sami Zayn at Money in the Bank?!

Be that as it may, McIntyre threatened to “eviscerate”Alexander for trying to pull a fast one last week. Regular viewers may recall that Alexander disguised himself as a janitor in order to fool Shane McMahon into letting him team with Roman Reigns last week. If you did watch that Raw though, you’ll also recall that McIntyre cleaned Alexander’s clock and pinned him. So why exactly does he feel so aggrieved?

"Tonight the joke will be on you." @CedricAlexander has a strong message for @DMcIntyreWWE before their matchup on #Raw! pic.twitter.com/p95rziipxF

— WWE (@WWE) July 16, 2019

Either way, the pair had a fun little match, which Alexander won out of nowhere with a surprise rollup. As for why we had this match, or where the result leaves McIntyre (and Alexander for that matter), that’s anyone’s guess.

Two Men with a Point to Prove

Finn Bálor and Samoa Joe took one another on in a battle of two men seeking to prove their worth. Bálor, of course, had been deposed by Shinsuke Nakamura as Intercontinental Champion and was desperate to re-establish himself on Raw. Samoa Joe, on the other hand, came into the match on the heels of a competitive WWE Championship defeat to Kofi Kingston. He, like Bálor, couldn’t really afford another high profile loss on Raw.

So, with two incredible performers and higher stakes than appeared at first glance, all was set for a drawn-out, thoroughly entertaining encounter.

And then Joe won in 90 seconds, before unsuccessfully attacking Finn.

BUT YOU ALREADY WON, @SamoaJoe! #Raw pic.twitter.com/KIrRi71fsx

— WWE (@WWE) July 16, 2019

This was a frankly stunningly anticlimactic result. Not for Bálor, who reports indicate may be due for some much-deserved (and needed) time off. But for the big ‘Samoan Submission Machine’.

We seem to have entered a bizarre purgatory for Joe, one in which he’s considered too good to linger in the midcard, yet not quite good enough to stay in the main title frame for long. So what we see is this rather unsatisfying yo-yo effect, where the Bruiser alternates wins and losses, keeping him in a constant state of flux. He is the human perpetual motion machine: constantly moving, yet ultimately going nowhere.

The Street Profits are Unbearable

The NXT Tag Team Champions made periodic appearances throughout the night to provide their commentary on events that had just played out and also to make predictions on matches yet to come.

Gotta love when the #StreetProfits give their match predictions. #Raw @MontezFordWWE @AngeloDawkins pic.twitter.com/k05IPtCEsH

— WWE (@WWE) July 16, 2019

I can tolerate the talented duo on NXT, where they’re allowed to show off their abilities in the ring. But take that away from them, hand them a badly written Raw script, and they become an ungodly, nauseating, obnoxious presence on the show. I honestly can’t stand the Monday night version of these two.

This is the Dumbest, Dumbest Story I’ve Ever Known

Mike Kanellis was about to emerge through the curtain for his match against Zack Ryder, when his pregnant wife stopped him to further emasculate her husband, before announcing that she would be taking his place in the contest.

No, @MariaLKanellis you're pregnant! #Raw @RealMikeBennett pic.twitter.com/raGdpQ8glo

— WWE (@WWE) July 16, 2019

An obviously concerned Mike ran after her to stop her from getting into the ring (and also prevent any unnecessary lawsuits). He assured his wife that he had it in hand, before sliding into the ring and promptly being beaten by Ryder.

Much to the disgust of Maria, even the ring announcer got in on the act by announcing Ryder as “the winner in less than one minute“. I have no idea what Kanellis did to deserve this unprecedented burial by his wife, Raw’s undercard and seemingly every WWE official, but it sure doesn’t make for good TV.

The Club of Adequacy

The recently re-united team of AJ Styles, Karl Anderson and Luke Gallows took on Lucha House Party in a match most would assume was poised to cement the former as a top-tier force on Raw.

Instead, the six-man contest turned into an overlong, drag-out affair, which saw Lucha House Party put out more offence than they’ve managed to all year. Once Ricochet came out of the crowd to attack Styles – without disqualification – I truly lost all hope. And there was still a commercial break and five minutes of wrestling to come!

#LuchaHouseParty is starting to roll! #Raw @LuchadorLD pic.twitter.com/PIzdRMTI78

— WWE (@WWE) July 16, 2019

Eventually Styles was tagged in and the United States Champion picked up the submission win using the Calf Crusher. But by then, the shine had well and truly worn off. The Club needed a quick, decisive win here, and all they got was a competitive showing against borderline (albeit immensely athletic) enhancement talent.

Becky Will Be Okay, Everybody!

Seth Rollins gave a backstage interview ahead of the 10-man Battle Royal, in which he railed against Brock Lesnar taking his Universal Title and vowed to reclaim it.

"I will fight anyone and beat anyone until I fight @BrockLesnar and BEAT @BrockLesnar." –@WWERollins #Raw pic.twitter.com/xwGwjcKDcl

— WWE (@WWE) July 16, 2019

Most of all though, he assured us all that Becky Lynch is “the toughest person he’s ever met” and that she’ll be okay. I’m not sure which is lamer: getting the stamp of approval from a decidedly un-cool Rollins, or being so fragile that a single End of Days can plausibly knock you out for several days.

We know Becky’s tough! We know she’s ‘The Man’! The last thing we need is Seth Rollins becoming her advocate and life coach.

The Most Fatal of Four-Ways

Before Naomi, Natalya, Alexa Bliss and Carmella faced off to determine the next challenger to the Raw Women’s Championship, a hobbling Becky Lynch made her entrance, ostensibly to “scout her competition”. Michael Cole was shocked – shocked! – to see the Champ, considering she ate an End of Days from Baron Corbin at Extreme Rules. Apparently he hit her so hard that it gave her a limp. I hated this.

But not as much as I hated the women’s four-way.

From the get-go, this match was a disaster. Contested under elimination rules, Naomi and Natalya had a stuttering exchange to start, before Carmella crept in to attempt no fewer than FOUR pinfalls on each woman… and screeched after each kick-out. It was ‘nails on a chalkboard’ levels of unbearable.

Keep trying, @CarmellaWWE! #Raw pic.twitter.com/A1GDDTmX29

— WWE (@WWE) July 16, 2019

Anyway, the three women continued to plod along, until a lurking Alexa Bliss snuck into the ring to roll-up an unsuspecting Carmella to secure the elimination. The agonisingly pedestrian match continued, transitioning from one poorly rehearsed spot to the next, with Alexa spending most of her time on the outside, looking to capitalise on an opening.

To their credit, the crowd had the decency to wait until the tenth chinlock to start chanting “this is awful”. Shortly thereafter, Natalya pinned Naomi with a Sunset Flip. And a few agonising minutes later, Natalya locked in the Sharpshooter on Bliss, bringing our long national nightmare to an end.

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As much as I genuinely do appreciate each of the women involved, Alexa was the only one who demonstrated anything approaching charisma or personality. But she was never going to win, after twice failing to best Bayley in recent weeks. So instead we seemingly get Becky Lynch vs. Natalya at SummerSlam… argh.

Dolph Ziggler Redirect

It’s been almost three months since Dolph Ziggler returned to WWE, which means that he was due for a gimmick change.

So, as the guest on MizTV last night, Ziggler decided to become the moral authority on Raw. He berated Miz for not being true to his roots, turning his back on his working class Cleveland upbringing in favour of the glitzy, superficial Hollywood lifestyle. Then he insulted Maryse and it all kicked off.

"You have become everything you hate." –@HEELZiggler has some OPINIONS for @mikethemiz tonight. #Raw pic.twitter.com/KbKzOuqnnG

— WWE (@WWE) July 16, 2019

Whatever, man. Please can we get to the main event already.

Overall Rating for the Show (From best to worst: RawSome, Cor, AvRAWge, Poor and RawFul)

What an awful edition of Raw.

On paper, everything appeared to be in place for a fairly entertaining Monday night. In the aftermath of a largely well-received Extreme Rules, the next chapter of the red brand appeared dedicated to redirecting the product heading into SummerSlam.

We needed new number one contenders, and so the women had an elimination fourway, while the men were booked in a 10-man Battle Royal. But the traditionally fun, multi-person affairs barely rose above acceptable (in the case of the men) and downright boring (in the case of the women).

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Overlaid with the disappointment of the title scene though, were all of the complimentary pieces. Seth cut an awful promo, Becky looked terrible and The Club were wholly unimpressive. Even further down the card things looked decidedly gloomy, with Drew McIntyre, The Street Profits and Mike Kanellis languishing in purgatory.

Perhaps the most damning indictment of Raw was that, on a night when Bray Wyatt finally made his highly anticipated return, the episode as a whole remained entirely forgettable. If not for that singular moment, this was an unwatchable edition of the red brand.

Raw this week was Poor.

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5 years ago by Nicholas Holicki

WWE Raw – July 15, 2019 (Review)