Mick Foley is famous for bumps rather than punchlines but he’s subtly been at the centre of most of the great moments of comedy throughout the Attitude Era. Spoiler alert: he’s in 3 of the top five. No matter who he was partnering with, being Stone Cold, The Rock or Vince McMahon, Foley’s sheer force of personality steals the scene with every mumbled, tragic, barely audible aside while the louder personalities shout. Case in point, the October 5th 1998 episode of raw.
Vince is in hospital after having his ankle crushed by the undertaker (the previous Raw) and the purest soul in the history of wrestling tries to cheer the chairman up with a host of goodies, including balloons (aren’t they colourful), chocolates (I know you like the sweet stuff) and Yurple the clown (she does a trick with a dog you wouldn’t believe).
Watching actual millionaire Vince McMahon in a hospital gown saying ‘don’t show me any damn trick with the dog’ is a surreal but wonderful sight, but of course the best is yet to come, as Foley introduces Vinnie Mac to Mr Socko. It’s perfect, the way it creeps into shot, the way Foley’s voice cracks slightly when he says Socko, to the moment Vince breaks and growls ‘dammit, leave’. Bonus points to later in the same episode where Austin attacks McMahon featuring the best timed bedpan shot in the history of entertainment.
4. Milkomania (Raw – August 20, 2001)
During his active years, Kurt Angle was everything the WWE ever needed in a wrestler. He was a mat genius, had inhuman cardio, but most importantly, he was consistently one of the greatest personalities on the roster.
Who else could seamlessly transition from colossal dork to the wrestling machine with perfect consistency? Who else could win a gold medal for America and still generate huge heel heat every single week with his amazing ‘Three Is’ promos. There are many examples in the attitude era of Kurt shelving his ego and debasing himself for the greater comedic good, whether it be mocking the Undertaker on a tiny scooter, wearing the tiny cowboy hat, or dressing up like a mini-me version of ‘Taker.
But actually, his greatest crowning moment in the attitude era was a rare moment of Kurt being the dominant babyface as he crashed Steve Austin Appreciation night the Raw after SummerSlam 2001 and soaked the entire Alliance with milk. Tony would have been proud. It succeeds both as a hilarious parody of Austin’s beer bath whilst also being uniquely cool in its strange nerdy badassery, which is pretty much Kurt Angle’s career right there. Bonus points to JR for the line ‘the billion dollar princess has become a dairy queen’ and a special guest appearance of Shawn Stasiak running into a thing.
3. Heel Austin (2001)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jIOMEymyLnY
Taken as a whole, when you consider its potential, the Invasion of the WWF by the Alliance was a lot of things. Bad, crap, s***, but it actually had some great stuff nestled in amongst the money pouring through WWE’s fingers.
Milkomania was one, but greater even than that was Steve Austin’s run as a bizarrely affectionate heel. After turning at Mania X-7, Austin went from being the biggest badass on the planet to a colossal McMahonophiliac as even his own mind couldn’t comprehend the turn and melted in the sun. Austin began telling Vince he loved him, serenading him with Kum By Yah, and best of all, while Vince was trying to rally the troops before invasion, repeating the last word Vince said whilst puffing out his chest like he was a superhero .
Stone Cold Steve Austin trying to look tough is odd to seem, but absolutely hilarious and everyone who shared a promo with him got to shine. Even legendarily bad promo Debra got some laughs when onscreen with Heel Austin. One great promo saw her get soaked in milk. “You look ridiculous” said Austin, before shouting “I’m the champion” to which Debra responds “I’M DEBRA”.
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